Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Something Else I Don't Get

It's not just the economy, there's a lot of stuff in our world that I just don't get. Today I was thinking about one of them. I have to go to work, so this won't be a long post, just a brief reflection. Here's what I don't get:

The open-face sandwich. ...How is that a sandwich? I was not aware sandwiches HAD faces. Doesn't that fly in the face (hee hee) of vegetarians who don't eat "anything with a face"? Nor is a face something that can be "open"; what's the opposite, a "closed-face"? What the heck would that even look like? So many other things in our world have "faces", but none of them are ever referred to as "open". Ever see an "open-face clock"? Perhaps they use face because the sandwiches contents stare up at you. But that's still a lame use of language. It's like when people talk about open or closed fists. "Did he hit you with a closed fist, or an open fist?" Um, an open fist is called a hand. Maybe you've been hit by too many open fists to remember that. The only thing I can think of that approximates an "open fist" is a deaf person signing the letter E.

But this is about sandwiches. The sandwich was invented as a way to hold the contents of one's meal in bread so he could eat with a hand and not need utensils. Once you open that sandwich, it's NOT a sandwich! Let's not kid ourselves. An "open-face sandwich" is just a salad on top of a slice of bread. So readers, should you come across anyone who offers your an open-face sandwich, or one who orders an open-face sandwich, you have my permission to give them your open fist.


  1. I guess the idea of an "open-face" sandwich IS kind of weird. Sort of like strawberry shortcake without the strawberries. I seem to recall that in elementary school, one of the "hot lunches" was "hot turkey sandwich". There was turkey and bread covered in gravy. I don't remember if the sandwich was "open-face" or not, but somehow I THINK it was.
    That also seemed like kind of a weird sandwich to me, in that it was hot, covered with gravy, and you had to eat it with a knife and fork.

  2. i'd never heard of an open face sandwich before. so i looked it up. to me those are just toast with crazy toppings for fat people-- not a sanwich til you add the top piece of bread.
    whoever invented that stupid thing is an idiot

  3. Growing up the only "open-face" sandwich my mother ever served was grilled cheese, she never cooked it with 2 slices of bread on a grill. No, a grilled cheese sandwich was white bread covered with an American cheese slice, which was browned in the broiler. It could be eaten by hand once cool to the touch, so it was a sandwich. However since it was broiled not grilled, maybe it should have been a broiled cheese sandwich?

    Anyway with our lovely, rich language that borrows from everything, how can we object to drift in the use of the term sandwich? After all it started as an impatient Earl, not a foodstuff.

  4. Even if eaten by hand, I still can't classify a one-slice thing as a "sandwich" unless folded over, or perhaps a wrap. I mean, that's like calling cinnamon toast a "sandwich".

  5. Regarding your digression on fists: open-fist, closed-fist, or the letter ‘e’ the appendage attached to your wrist remains a hand. ;>